*The only toast you eat is someone else's cast offs
*You consider the bathroom fan "white noise"
*You don't care who is in the washroom with you
*You say things like, "we only shoot trees with our guns!"
*You clean up your child's upchuck at the dinner table and then go back and finish eating
*You consider an evening trip to the grocery store by yourself a "night out
*You are picking out shoes for a dress, not based on sex appeal, but whether or not you will be able to pick up your kids in them and not kill yourself at the same time!
*You fall asleep at the dentist cause its literally the most relaxed you've been all year ......(not that that happened to me or anything?!)
*You miss major news events because Treehouse doesn't run a ticker
*You know what it's like to sleep sitting up- in your own house
*You've had a long awaited girls day of shopping only to blow the budget on cute clothes for your kids.
*You find yourself swaying back and forth in the line at the bank even tho the kids are at home with dad!
*Hubby can tell what the kids ate that day based on the stains on your own shirt
*You go out for a rare date night with hubby, and wind up in the baby section of stores buying for the kids
*You have no shame sticking your face against a baby's bum for a sniff test
*Your grown up dish cupboard is now overflowing with a rainbow of plastic dinnerware
*You hear teens swearing and you can't help but say "Your mamma would be so upset by this."
*You're so used to pushing a stroller and using the wheelchair automatic door open button at stores, you push that button even when you're by yourself instead of just opening the door
*You're so used to having kids in the back seat, then when you're driving on your own, you have a panic attack thinking you forgot the kids somewhere.
You've never seen a waiter deliver food to your table as you're always walking around the restaurant
*Swear words in songs make you tense up
*You spend days feeling like you're on a bad date when your kids paw and climb on you
*Sleeping in a king sized bed is a joke, between your hubby and your kids you're lucky to get one sixteenth of the mattress to sleep on
*You can navigate your bedroom in the pitch dark, every time.
*You consider the bathroom fan "white noise"
*You don't care who is in the washroom with you
*You say things like, "we only shoot trees with our guns!"
*You clean up your child's upchuck at the dinner table and then go back and finish eating
*You consider an evening trip to the grocery store by yourself a "night out
*You are picking out shoes for a dress, not based on sex appeal, but whether or not you will be able to pick up your kids in them and not kill yourself at the same time!
*You fall asleep at the dentist cause its literally the most relaxed you've been all year ......(not that that happened to me or anything?!)
*You miss major news events because Treehouse doesn't run a ticker
*You know what it's like to sleep sitting up- in your own house
*You've had a long awaited girls day of shopping only to blow the budget on cute clothes for your kids.
*You find yourself swaying back and forth in the line at the bank even tho the kids are at home with dad!
*Hubby can tell what the kids ate that day based on the stains on your own shirt
*You go out for a rare date night with hubby, and wind up in the baby section of stores buying for the kids
*You have no shame sticking your face against a baby's bum for a sniff test
*Your grown up dish cupboard is now overflowing with a rainbow of plastic dinnerware
*You hear teens swearing and you can't help but say "Your mamma would be so upset by this."
*You're so used to pushing a stroller and using the wheelchair automatic door open button at stores, you push that button even when you're by yourself instead of just opening the door
*You're so used to having kids in the back seat, then when you're driving on your own, you have a panic attack thinking you forgot the kids somewhere.
You've never seen a waiter deliver food to your table as you're always walking around the restaurant
*Swear words in songs make you tense up
*You spend days feeling like you're on a bad date when your kids paw and climb on you
*Sleeping in a king sized bed is a joke, between your hubby and your kids you're lucky to get one sixteenth of the mattress to sleep on
*You can navigate your bedroom in the pitch dark, every time.
And my personal favourite:
* The rare instance when you're driving with only adults, but announce proudly, "Look out my side, COWS!"
What are some of the crazy things you think need to be added to this list?
Forgot this great one- you just about squeeze ketchup into your daughter's cup, eat all three meals while breastfeeding, and your toddler points to the bags under your eyes and says "mommy eyes ow ?"
ReplyDelete